


crime doesn't pay (but the benefits package is great)

by theheadgirl



Category: Descendants (2015), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/F, Gen, Well someone had to write it, avengers descendants
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-30
Updated: 2016-07-30
Packaged: 2018-07-28 06:12:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7628167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theheadgirl/pseuds/theheadgirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Evie convinces Byron to buy her beer. Sarah is not pleased. Alana, Katya, and Leif get involved, and invisibility, fake IDs, and feelings ensue.</p>
            </blockquote>





	crime doesn't pay (but the benefits package is great)

"You agreed to WHAT?" Before Byron can defend himself, Sarah holds up a hand to forestall him, her question entirely rhetorical. "No, I just want to be sure I'm clear on this. A VK batted her eyelashes at you and you agreed to buy her beer? That's against the law! You're not twenty-one!"

"It all happened so fast!" Sarah isn't going to buy it, but Byron tries anyway. "She's impossible to say no to, you know how she operates!"

"So do you!" Realizing she is on the brink of yelling, Sarah inhales, lowers her voice. "But I guess you still fell for it - and are you even invited? You didn't agree to break the law for her without a confirmed invite, did you?"

Byron can't quite meet her eyes. "She said she had to talk to Mal about it."

"Oh my GOD. You have to go back and tell her no! No one is worth getting kicked out of Auradon Prep for!"

Before she can continue, a badly muffled snicker cuts her off. Byron looks around uncertainly. He certainly didn't laugh, and Sarah is not in a laughing mood either, but they appear to be the only ones in the room. Unless...

"...is Katya here?"

"She is my roommate," Sarah says, then looks over at an apparently unoccupied chair. "All the stealth technology in the world won't help if you can't keep your mouth shut."

"Come on," a girl's voice replies from the otherwise empty chair. "You're such a Girl Scout, Sarah." The chair spins by itself so it faces them. "Of course he can. People buy beer underage all the time."

"Can you turn ... back on, please?" Byron asks. Now that he knows where to look, he can see the air shimmering around Katya, but it's disconcerting to talk to someone who apparently isn't there. 

There is a pause. "I ... can't," Katya admits. "Alana didn't include an off switch."

Now it's Byron's turn to laugh, but he quells it at the look on Sarah's face. 

"You can laugh, but I'm not the one who's got to figure out how to buy beer for a VK," Katya snaps back. 

"You seem to be the expert here," Byron replies. "What would you recommend, Miss People-Buy-Underage-All-the-Time?"

The air shimmers in a sort of circular motion, and it takes a moment for Byron to realize it's Katya tossing her hair.

"Go to a 7-Eleven and buy it. Obviously."

"Alcohol isn't sold in Arcadia," Sarah says. "Any alcohol served at royal events is specially imported." 

"How do you know that?" Byron asks.

"If you paid attention in Kingdom Management, you'd know that was one of the first laws King Adam passed, especially since he was building a school here."

"You're going to inherit an intelligence agency, not a tiara, Sarah," Katya says.

"Being an effective leader is the same whether it's S.H.I.E.L.D. or a kingdom," Sarah retorts. She shakes herself, then turns back to Byron. "So. 7-Eleven is out. What's your next step?"

"Alana," Byron realizes. "Alana!" He pushes back the desk chair and rushes out of the room, Sarah and Katya on his heels.

"Alana isn't going to help with whatever harebrained scheme you're planning!" Sarah calls. Ignoring her, Byron comes to a stop outside one of the doors in the girls' dormitory, and knocks.

"Please step back from the door for biometric identification," says a pleasant male voice. Byron does so, and a blue light comes from the top of the door, scanning each of them from head to toe.

"Identified: Byron Banner, Sarah Carter-Rogers, and Ekaterina Barton. Access granted." The door clicks open and they go in. 

Although the room is, in theory, identical to the one Sarah and Katya share, the room's occupant has put her mark on the place. There's tools and tech scattered all over the place, a large console to the side, and no less than six laptops and tablets all humming along. The occupant herself is standing at the large flat console, staring at a 3D rendering of Auradon Prep, fingers drumming along the edge of it. She looks over at her visitors in time to see Byron pushed aside by apparently nothing.

"Turn me off," Katya demands.

Alana raises her eyebrows. "That's the first time I've heard that one."

"Turn. Me. Off."

Alana holds out her hand. "Wrist." Her hand closes around thin air and she runs her fingers along it. Unsettlingly, her fingers vanish mid-air, and she looks up at the ceiling, muttering to herself. "Charm. Bangle. Bangle. Bangle. Ah!" She twists something and the air turns back into a redheaded girl. Alana pulls her hand out from Katya's sleeve, holding a thin gold bracelet. 

"That did not work when I tried it," Katya immediately defends herself, as though she can see Byron trying not to laugh. 

Alana spins the bracelet on a finger and lets it fly. It lands with a clatter onto a pile of tech, then immediately slides off and ends up on the floor. "I'll fix it later," she says, then goes back to staring at the rendering. 

"Alana?" Sarah prompts her. "What are you doing?"

"Figuring out how I'd blow this place up," Alana replies, in a one-hundred percent normal and expected answer.

"I beg your pardon?"

"The Fairy Godmother asked me to have a look at any weak spots," Alana explains. "That Maleficent thing scared her. Not that she'd ever admit it, but she wanted security and defensibility way up."

"Something something fox, something something henhouse," Katya says. She picks up something that looks like a gun and fiddles with it, lining up the sight. 

"Alana, I need your help," Byron says.

Alana looks up from the rendering. "Don't forget leg day," she offers. 

"I need help buying beer."

"Do you need cash?" Alana asks. "Wallet's over there." She nods to another precarious pile of tech.

"No, I need a fake ID. And a ride."

This catches Alana's interest. "And you're in on this, American Way?"

"I'm just making sure no one dies," Sarah replies, crossing her arms over her chest. This is, of course, Sarah's way of saying yes, but having accountability that she didn't *exactly* agree if they get caught. 

"Not that I'm one to look some gift beer in the mouth, but how did you end up in this situation?"

"Eeeeeevie asked him," Katya reports in a singsong tone. She's still playing with the gun, having disassembled it and begun examining the pieces. "Does this set the bullets on fire when you pull the trigger?"

"Close enough," Alana replies. "Fix it." She turns her gaze back to Byron. "Fake ID's no problem. Ride is no problem. We need Leif, though."

"Why?" Byron asks. 

"You look nineteen." Alana dismisses the rendering with a wave of her hand, turning back to the console, begins typing. A moment later, she tosses a projection of a New York ID into the air, shimmering. "Leif looks twenty-five, especially with that stupid beard he's growing." As they watch, she picks up a tablet and starts typing, and the information on the ID changes along with it. 

"I'll text him," Sarah sighs. 

"Tell him to hurry, and bring a spare shirt," Alana orders.

About ten minutes later, there's another knock at the door. A monitor by the door pops to life, showing the hallway outside, and the young man loitering by Alana's door. 

"Biometric scan complete," the pleasant male voice announces. "Your visitor is Leif Thorson. Grant or deny access, ma'am?"

"Granted," Alana calls. A moment later, the door swings open and Leif steps in.

"Why have you summoned me?" he cries.

"Change shirts," Alana says. 

"What?" Leif says, suddenly sounding significantly less grandiose. 

"Didn't Sarah tell you to bring another shirt? You can't be wearing the same shirt you're wearing on your ID when you buy the beer. It'll make it obvious it's fake."

Katya smirks. "I didn't see you hesitating last week when you changed in front of the cheerleaders after tourney practice. Audrey sends lots of love, by the way."

"Why am I changing?" Leif asks, although it appears Katya's jibe worked, as he peels off his t-shirt. 

Since this is his mess, Byron volunteers an answer. "I need to buy beer. Alana thinks you look the closest to twenty-one." He's still sulking over her crack that he looks nineteen. 

"A quest!" Leif pulls on his second shirt, a red henley, and Sarah abruptly looks away, clicking her phone on a moment too late. "I didn't know you were the beer sort, Banner."

"I'm not," Byron replies. "I - "

"He got conned into it by a VK," Sarah finishes. 

"If you think a single act of valor will win the fairest's heart from her dwarf-son, you are mistaken," Leif intones. "But a quest! When do we begin?"

Alana points at a chair. It's been marginally cleared - they've moved any sort of delicate electronic components off it, but there's still a couple of books on it. Leif pushes them off and sits. 

"Look straight ahead," Alana says. She taps at a tablet and a camera drops down from the ceiling, lining up at Leif's eye level. On the hologram of the ID, a live preview of the picture appears. Alana frowns at it and taps a few more times on her tablet.

"Okay, now smile." As soon as she says it, Leif breaks out into a huge, sunny smile. 

"Delightfully winsome," Katya reports.

"That is the happiest ID I've ever seen," Byron says. He also has to grudgingly admit that Alana was right - with his large build and confident posture, and of course the beard he's sporting, Leif is believably at least twenty-one. 

He glances aside at one of the mirrors that isn't completely covered with stuff and apprises himself. I could look twenty-one if I grew a beard, he tells himself, scrubbing a hand over his chin. Even just some stubble.

Alana taps a few more buttons on another tablet. "We don't want to push it too much," she says to herself. "Twenty-two." The last two digits on the ID change and now proclaim that Leif Thorson, of New York City, New York, is twenty-two and three months old. She taps another button and a printer spits out a small, perfect replica of an identification card. She picks it up, shaking it a little, and holds it up proudly. 

"Next step: we've got to steal a plane."

 

Of course, "steal" is not exactly the correct verb. It's Alana's plane, and she's got the keys to it. They don't really have to sneak out, either, since Auradon Prep students are allowed to leave the campus on weekends. However, "we've got to steal a plane" does sound significantly cooler than "let's go fly my legally obtained plane at a time when we have the permission to leave." 

Katya leans around the corner, peering through the hall. She holds up a hand to indicate "wait," then a beckoning gesture for "go!"

Leif, having changed back into his t-shirt, is first. With his muscular build and blond hair, he's the most likely to be spotted, giving the others time to scatter if necessary. Byron goes next, then Sarah, followed by Alana, and Katya brings up the rear. 

"Footsteps!" Byron hisses, hearing someone up ahead. Alana pulls off her necklace and tosses it to Leif.

"You two," she says in a low voice, pointing to Byron and Katya, "grab his wrists, then Leif, click the pendant!"

"What about us?" Sarah whispers furiously. 

Alana grins. Her eyes flick to the other three as Leif clicks the pendant. There's a soft whirring sound, and they vanish.

Before Sarah can splutter out another question, Alana pushes her up against one of the support columns and kisses her. Sarah grabs at her in an attempt to end it, but Alana mutters "trust me!" against her mouth, and Sarah gives in.

Barely a moment later, the Fairy Godmother walks through, her daughter Jane at her heels. She doesn't notice the enthusiastically engaged couple, but Jane does. Her eyes go wide, and Alana breaks the kiss long enough to wink at the brunette and press a finger against her lips. Jane blushes and quickly looks away as Sarah pulls Alana back in.

The footsteps fade away, and the girls break apart. 

"What the hell, Stark?" Sarah demands, making an attempt to smooth her hair back into its neat French braid. 

"We needed an excuse to be sneaking around an empty corridor," Alana replies. Annoyingly, she doesn't have a hair out of place. "Click the pendant again, Leif."

"If I don't," Leif's voice comes from nowhere, "will you two kiss again?"

Sarah rolls her eyes and crosses her arms over her chest. Alana is quiet a moment too long before she chuckles.

"That's a no. Let's get going."

Once everyone is visible again, they continue on their way to the hangar. They make it there with little further issue, and Alana presses a button on the fob. The plane beeps and the door pops open, a set of stairs unfolding from it.

"I still can't believe your dad just gave you a plane," Byron says. 

Alana shrugs. "He wasn't using it." As though this is a completely acceptable answer, she takes the stairs two at a time, and the others follow.

"Byron, you're navigating," she adds. "I figure somewhere in the city. You'll need to find somewhere we can land the plane that's near a convenience store. The Bronx, I think."

"On it." Byron takes the co-pilot's seat and starts tapping on the GPS unit. Katya, Sarah, and Leif settle down in the back. It is a Stark Industries creation, so it's roomier than it looks from the outside, and full of creature comforts.

Katya settles on a couch and waits for Sarah to sit before she leans forward, grinning.

"So what was that?"

"Another of Alana's half-baked ideas," Sarah replies. She gets out her phone and pointedly looks at it instead of Katya.

"Uh-huh," Katya says, smirking. "And you didn't enjoy it at all."

"This conversation is over."

"I liked the part where she stopped kissing you and then you had her start again," Leif says thoughtfully. 

"I liked that part too, Leif," Alana calls from up front. 

Sarah makes a noise of irritation and curls up in a corner of her own couch, putting her phone in front of her face. 

 

The flight from Auradon to New York never seems to be the same length twice. Sometimes it's two hours, sometimes it's five. This one is long enough that Katya, Sarah, and Leif have fallen asleep in the back, leaving Byron and Alana up front. 

"So, Evie, huh?" Alana says. "Never saw you as going for the bad girls."

"I don't go for them," Byron tries to defend himself, though it's kind of an indefensible position, considering the circumstances. "Evie just ... " He shrugs. "She did what she does. You know."

"Eyelashes and a smile."

"Something like that." He still doesn't feel any less stupid for having fallen for it, but knowing someone else shares the weakness is a relief. 

"Chin up, Banner, we're almost there." Alana nods to the navigational system. "ETA?"

"Half an hour. I'll go wake the others." He moves to get up, then pauses. "What about you and Sarah?"

"What about us?" Something about the set of Alana's shoulders changes. 

Byron shakes his head. "Never mind. I'll be back."

 

There's a park that Byron's found for Alana to land in, walking distance from a few convenience stores - and on a Friday night, hopefully one that's busy enough that they won't look too closely at Leif or his ID. Once they enter New York's airspace, Alana engages the invisibility function on the plane. As a result, a whole lot of nothing appears to kick up a storm of grass and dirt in the middle of the park. 

"Okay, American Way, what's the plan?" Alana asks.

Sarah looks like she's about to protest, that she didn't go along with this with a plan, for heaven's sake - but then she sighs. 

"Alana and Katya, you'll stay with the plane so it's ready for a quick getaway if we need one. Byron, you're with me and Leif. We'll be keeping watch. You'll go inside with Leif and I'll stay outside. I don't expect anything to happen but I'd rather be prepared if it does."

Katya laughs. "Boy, someone might think you'd been thinking about this."

Sarah dismisses her with an imperious wave of her hand. "Any questions?"

Everyone seems set, so Alana and Katya take their spots while the other three set off.

They find a convenience store about a block away.

"ID?" Sarah asks Leif. He nods. "And cash?" Another nod. 

"Byron, you'll go in first. Walk by the beer, scout out which one Evie wanted, then wander around a bit. Leif, you'll go in a thirty-count after Byron. Make sure you bump into him to get the intelligence, then get the beer and go. Once he's done, you'll get some juice or chips, then come out and we go."

"What will you do?" Leif asks.

"Keep an eye out for cops." She raises her eyebrows at them. "Ready?"

"Let's go." 

Byron goes in first. The store is a bit busy - there's about six other people with him, and he slouches over to the refrigerated cabinet, eyeing the beer selection while standing in front of the juices. Evie hadn't given him a brand, just a number - "like, a twenty-four pack? Could you do that for me?" He doesn't see a twenty-four pack, but he spots a thirty-pack for cheap - he's sure they could easily afford the best in there, but he doubts it would make any difference. 

The bell over the door jangles again as Leif enters, and Byron wanders off towards him. Their paths cross by the beef jerky, so Byron stops to pick one up.

"The Natural Light," he breathes. "Thirty-pack."

"Hm," Leif says, and keeps going. Byron supposes that's all the confirmation he's going to get, and goes to have a look at the candy.

Although Leif doesn't have any doubts about Sarah's plan, he's still worried about the whole thing. What if they get caught? 

Be the confident warrior you are! he tells himself. You will not find victory in questions, only in actions! 

So thinking, he opens the cabinet and pulls out the large pack of Natural Light beer, and brings it up to the cashier. 

"Can I see your ID?" the cashier asks.

"Of course," Leif says, and shows it to him through the little window in his wallet.

"You need to get it out," the cashier says.

Leif pulls the card out of his wallet and hands it over to the cashier. As the cashier examines it, Leif tries to look cool and confident and definitely over twenty-one. He wonders if everyone can hear his heart pounding or if it's just him.

The cashier hands it back and scans the beer. "Fifteen eighty-one."

It takes Leif a second too long to nod and get the cash out, handing him a twenty. He gets his change, then picks up the beer and walks out.

Byron picks up a Mountain Dew and brings it up front. "Oh, these too," he adds, grabbing a bag of Doritos.

When Byron walks out front, he sees Leif looking around frantically. "Sarah!" he calls. "Sarah!" Spotting Byron, he adds, "Sarah's gone!"

"What? You don't think - " As the daughter of Captain America and the founder of S.H.I.E.L.D, Sarah is a valuable target.

"Wait! Do you hear that?"

Byron listens, then catches the unmistakable sound of flesh against flesh. "Sounds like a fight." 

The two boys take off towards the noise and stop in front of the mouth of an alley, just as Sarah lands a haymaker on a guy's jaw, and he collapses to the ground. Her nose is bleeding and she's squinting through one eye in the predecessor to a shiner, but she stoops and grabs a purse from the man's hand, turning to hand it back to a woman cowering in the corner.

"Here you go, ma'am. Have a good night."

The woman takes the purse and gets out a "thank you" before she hurries off. Sarah steps neatly over the prone body - no, bodies - and, spotting Byron and Leif, has the good grace to look sheepish. 

"Good watching out for us," Byron remarks.

"You did fine," Sarah replies. "Let's get back."

Leif pulls a travel pack of Kleenex out of his pocket and hands it to Sarah. She takes it and presses one to her nose. 

When they get back to the plane, Katya gets the door for them and raises her eyebrows at the sight.

"So, we got the beer, and Sarah got punched in the face. Just as planned."

"What?!" Alana calls from inside the plane. Katya steps out of the way, allowing the other three in. Leif hauls their prize into the back, and Alana stares at Sarah.

"I thought you were joking about Sarah getting punched in the face," she says to Katya.

"Am I ever joking about that?" Katya asks. "Remember Thronecoming last year?"

"He hit me first," Sarah points out, picking up the first aid kit and vanishing into the back.

"And prom?"

A hesitation from the back. "Allie told Greg to leave her alone, and he was being a jackass about it. So really, he started it."

Byron takes his seat at the navigation panel again and Katya goes to the back. Leif has their prize on the floor between his feet, and Sarah is trying to clean up the blood around her nose.

"It went well?" Katya asks. 

"Our quest was successful!" Leif agrees. "Let me tell you of our valor."

The flight back doesn't seem to take nearly as long as the one there had. 

"Call your girlfriend," Alana tells Byron once they've landed. "We did all this for her, she's going to come get it."

"Oh, Byron!" she hears Evie coo on the other end of the line. "You did that for me? You're so kind! Mal and I will be there soon."

"No problem. I - hey!" Byron gasps as Sarah comes up front and yanks the phone out of his hand. 

"Hi, Evie, this is Sarah. Just wanted to verify the time and place of your party."

"I'm sorry?" Evie says. 

"I'm verifying the time and place of your party, since we'll be attending it. If you'd rather, I'd be happy to put Alana or Katya on to extract that information." 

"Oh!" Evie laughs. "Of course!" She gives a time and location just off-campus. Sarah glances at Alana. The dark-haired girl nods and leans forward to the panel in front of her, typing away.

"Thanks. I'll give you back to Byron now." She does, then goes to lean over Alana's shoulder.

"See you soon, Evie," he says, for lack of anything else to say.

"See you soon!"

He hangs up, then looks up at Sarah. "Change of heart, Miss You-Shouldn't-Drink-Underage?"

"I got a black eye for this thing," Sarah replies. "I never said I was going to drink, but I'm damned if I'm not going."

"Got it," Alana says. "Text to Ruby and Freddie last night. Same time and place. We're good."

"You didn't have to hack her phone, she just told you that," Byron points out. 

"Corroborate, corroborate, corroborate!" Alana replies. "Multiple sources never hurt."

"Now what?" Katya asks. "Are we going out to wait for her?"

"Nope," says Alana. "Cameras in the hangar."

"Ah!" Leif booms from the back. "So if anyone is spotted with the spoils, it's the fairest and the witch-daughter! An excellent plan!"

"Proximity alert," the computer's pleasant voice announces. "Your visitors are Mal and Evie. Shall I let them in?"

"Temporary access granted," Alana replies, and the plane door slides open. "Time to get this hot potato into someone else's hands."

 

The moon is high over the woods, although this clearing is already lit with a fire that's a little too green-tinged to be entirely natural. A speaker set with a phone plugged into it provides the music, and the opened, half-empty box of Natural Light helps with some of the entertainment. Evie is leading Byron through a slightly tipsy waltz, one that seems to involve more giggling than is usually associated with waltzing. Mal and Ben are pressed together, and it's not quite clear if they're dancing slowly or just standing there and making out. Audrey stumblingly follows Lonnie’s instructions for break-dancing while Carlos and Jay talk, pointedly ignoring Chad, who’s staring at his phone.

"Where are Leif and Katya?" Sarah asks, frowning a little as she peers around the clearing. Between the dim light of the fire and Katya's deft hand with concealer, her shiner is only visible if you know to look for it. Although normally she doesn't like covering her small victories, awkward questions needed to be avoided, like "hey Sarah, who punched you in the face?"

Alana pushes up onto her elbows for a moment, then shrugs and lies back down. "Probably snuck off together somewhere. They'll be back." 

They fall into silence again. Sarah wraps her arms around her knees and stares into the fire. 

"American Way?"

"Hm?"

"Why did you kiss me back?"

She can hear Sarah shifting in the grass. "It had to look convincing. If I'd been fighting or looked like I didn't want to be there, Jane would've said something."

"And that's the only reason?" Her tone is light, but as she sits up, her dark gaze is anything but. 

"Why did you kiss me in the first place?" Sarah deflects the question like she's holding her father's shield. "Why not Byron or Leif?"

"Everyone knows what I'm into," Alana replies. "I wouldn't have been able to sell it otherwise." She lets the silence spin out between them. "And I wanted to."

Sarah goes quiet, then: "I liked it." 

Since Sarah isn't looking at her, Alana doesn't bother to hide her grin. "Wanna try again sometime?"

"Dinner first," Sarah corrects her. "My parents would kill me if I didn't treat a lady properly."

"Dinner first," Alana echoes. She lies back down, and when she moves to put her hands behind her head, one of them is stopped by another hand taking it.

She looks at the other hand, all bruised knuckles and chipped blue nail polish, and she looks up at Sarah, who looks back and smiles.

"Come here," Alana says. She uses their hands to tug the other girl down, and as Sarah lies down, Alana gets her phone out and clicks it on.

"Tell me about the constellations," she tells it, holding it up to the sky.

Her phone begins to describe the constellations over Auradon in the early fall and she feels Sarah's warm weight settle against her. It seems to her, right now, the stars are shining a little more brightly just for them.

**Author's Note:**

> AVENGERS DESCENDENTS. I mean, now that Disney owns Marvel, who knows? ;) I've had this idea bouncing around for a while now and I'm so glad I finally got it out. This was a lot of fun to write and I may have Plans for their future adventures.


End file.
